Vocation

Where to begin? I look at my last blog post and it seems an age away. Within these months of summertime my direction and clarity of vocation has grown in leaps and bounds. Old fears and anticipations have dissipated like the mere clouds they were, friendship and fellowship continue despite no longer living within 100 meters of most everyone I hold dear, and the situations I once could only wonder about are now stored away as memories. It's all done and over with...

And yet... (I know it's cheesy) it's only begun.

My end at Houghton has merely been a lift-off. These four years have been critical in shaping my values and vocation, in almost an exponential way. These last experiences - graduation, a trip to Ecuador, and 6 weeks of research back at the school - were critical links that built off each other. As a result, I am beginning to understand my true vocation. My desire to be in health and medicine has turned to the naturopathic, and while I know this is so important and I am super excited to pursue this path, I realize that this is not my original calling. And I cannot forget this original calling; while I can be passionate for social justice, for deep healing, or for a restored creation, it is too easy to fall into the trap of being 1) overwhelmed (this happens a lot...) or 2) stuck on the issue. The more I research, the more stories I hear, the more I am exposed to... I see it is all broken. Everything is so inter-related, from the food we buy to the way it is produced (organic or on sale?), to the factories and transportation, even the way we eat (outside or in front of the T.V?) - and it is all connected to cultural and economic developments. Gah! How does one break it down?

But what it comes down to is grace.

My original calling, which is only now so clear to me as I pursue these issues on my heart, is to work towards the kingdom of God. It is an odd combination of just doing versus just being, of my need to be involved and yet God's grace that covers all. It is this vocation that I need to explore - I think that's what it means to work out our salvation with fear and trembling. Our most important preparations and 'pre-requisites' is the wisdom and understanding of God's kingdom, of his grace. For who can survive without hope? Without trust in a God that directs the mess and the chaos? Instead of being stuck on the issue of brokenness, we turn to grace. It is so beautifully simple.

In my own life I have been trying to be more simple, to live more in this grace and less in the systems set up by the world. And I hope to share some of the journey through this blog.