Metaphors always speak volumes more to me than plain old fact, and the only way to understand the current transitions underlying my life right now is that I am in the prairie. In Christian lingo, we have our mountain-top experiences of God, and we have our valleys of shadows and fears. I remember in highschool telling a friend of mine struggling with depression that we should keep our eyes on these mountains. However, I've grown to realize there is something much bigger (and much harder) than just living for the mountain-tops. There are some great quotes from Oswald Chambers that express this better than me and they go like this:
'We feel we could talk like angels and live like angels, if only we could stay on the mount....The test of our spiritual life is the power to descend; if we have the power to rise only, something is wrong...We are built for the valley...The mount is not meant to teach us anything, it is meant to make us something....We can see His glory on the mount, but we never live for His glory there. It is in the sphere of true humiliation that we find our true worth to God, that is where our faithfulness is revealed.'
As I'm wrestling with the expected and unexpected transitions of being back in my hometown, there is still a very clear sense of purpose in my studies of naturopathic medicine. However, it always goes back to relationships - I've left a strong community, and I'm facing the slow beginnings of fitting in to a new place. The shadows of the valley have drifted and I'm standing in an open field, but no mountain is in sight.
The really amazing thing about being in a prairie, though, is that it is designed for growth. The prairies are for planting and harvesting; it is full of humble hardwork, but I will miss out if I am only living for the next hike up the mountain. I need to trust that I have the right tools and experience to till the soil, that these seeds are meant to be planted here - that somehow, despite feeling quite far from where I fit, these people I meet now are meant to be in my life, and I in theirs.
